Counting The Cost

Random thoughts on walking with Jesus in this turvy-topsy world

Victory through Jesus

From the Voice of the Martyrs’ devotional, “Extreme Devotions”:

“Break him morally or destroy him physically!” The Turkmenistan bureaucrats had no more patience for this street preacher. Shageldy Atakov was offered his freedom under President Saparmurat Niyazov’s December 23, 2000, amnesty, provided he would swear the oath of allegiance to the president and recite the Muslim creed. Shageldy refused the amnesty again.

    Shageldy had been threatened by state officials before to stop preaching. He was arrested in December 1998 and sentenced to two years in jail, but a prosecutor appealed the verdict as “too lenient.” He was then sentenced to two additional years in prison. Shageldy was in such pain from the harsh beatings that he asked his children not to touch him.

    In February 2000, his wife and five children had been forcibly taken from their home and exiled to remote Kaakhka where they remained under “village arrest.”

    When his family visited him in early February of 2001, Shageldy said his farewells. His wife noticed that “during the visit he was bruised and battered, his kidneys and liver hurt, and he was suffering from jaundice. He could barely walk and frequently lost consciousness.” He did not expect to survive much longer.

    Despite this, Shegeldy was still not broken. He would not give in, and though release was within his reach, he would not accept it if it meant forsaking his allegiance to Christ.

posted by: Jrobbins at 12:27 | link | comments |
extreme devotions

The Dark Before the Dawn

“What Caused My Fire to Lose Its Glow?”

Melissa Taylor, Proverbs 31 Speaker Team Member

Key Verse:

Hebrews 13:5b, “…be satisfied with what you have.  For God has said, ‘I will never leave you. I will never forsake you.’” (NLT)

Devotion:

If asked to describe my faith, for years I would’ve told you that I was on fire for the Lord.  My relationship with God was intimate and joyful.  I was passionate for His Word. I had a love for teaching my children about God and His promises.  Leading Bible studies and speaking at various events fueled me even more.  No matter what my circumstances, I seemed to be able to draw peace and joy that could only come from knowing Jesus.  You see, I trusted God completely.  I totally believed His Word.  When it was time to celebrate, I praised His Holy Name.  When it was time to mourn, I trusted His plan.  It wasn’t always easy, but I maintained a fire that, it seemed, could not be extinguished.

Why then, I had to ask God, did that fire I had in my heart suddenly appear to be decreasing?  What was causing my fire to lose its glow?  I didn’t love God any less.  I hadn’t lost faith in His power.  I still believed every bit of His Word.  Why was I not “feeling” renewed, excited, joyful, and peaceful like I always had before?  Was my fire burning out?  The truth is that I was burned out.

Although I never thought my life or those around me were in my control, I was beginning to feel helpless in many roles of my life as a woman, mother, friend, daughter, sister, etc.  I was being pulled in so many directions.  So many people needed me and relied on me.  Out of the blue, unannounced, without my permission, and to my dismay, I felt completely numb inside.  I did not know what to do.  I was fine, but the circumstances around me overwhelmed me.  Where I ordinarily relied on God for guidance through the tough times, I couldn’t “feel” His presence anymore.  The worst part of this for me was that I couldn’t pinpoint why.

I thought I was doing all the right things.  I searched my Bible for answers daily.  I prayed and cried out to the Lord for help.  I confided in my closest Christian friends.  I was lost and felt abandoned by God without a concrete reason.  My passion and fire had fizzled.  My flame had reduced to a spark.  I had grown stale and tired in my walk with the Lord.   I was still going through the motions, but was still “feeling” no comfort.  Even worse, I started listening to country music….not the fun, happy songs, but the ones that make you cry!  I cried right along with them.

My husband and kids wanted to know where their wife and mom had gone.  I did too.  That summer became known as the “bummer summer.”

All my life, I’ve been an encourager and someone who naturally had a smile to share.  I enjoyed my life with which God had blessed me.  What happened to that person?  Would I be like this forever?  Thankfully, no.

I began to feel better over the next few months.  I wish I could tell you the answer, the reason, or the way that the spark became a flame again, but I can’t.  I hesitated to even write this story, because I didn’t have an answer to the question, “What caused my fire to lose its glow?”  What I can tell you is that I never gave up on God.  Even though I couldn’t feel His presence in my life, I knew He was there.  I knew it because I knew His Word, and I believed it.  Second Corinthians 5:7 says that we are to believe in what we can’t see.  I also had to learn to believe in what I couldn’t feel.

My friends and family prayed for me during this time.  I prayed for me too.  When I look back, I think God may have been trying to teach me to slow down, rest in Him, allow Him to carry me for a while, and to totally trust Him.

In my recent conversations with God, I have asked Him to please keep my flame burning bright for Him.  I want to possess a flame that is warm and inviting, much more than a mere spark.  It reminds me of a song I used to sing at camp, “It only takes a spark to get a fire going…”  Now my fire is indeed going again.  God also gave me a new life verse through this experience.  It is spoken by Jesus in Matthew 5:14-15.  He said, “You are the light of the world – like a city on a mountain, glowing in the night for all to see.  Don’t hide your light under a basket!  Instead, put it on a stand and let it shine for all.”  That’s exactly what I aim to do.

If you are in a place where you don’t “feel” God, do not give up.  Do not despair or worry.  Hang onto what you know is true, and that is the Word of God.  Read it often and trust Him to remain faithful, loving, and in control just like it says.  He will never abandon you, just as He never abandoned me.  God is true to His Word no matter how we are feeling.  He is true to His Word today, tomorrow and forever.

posted by: Jrobbins at 12:44 | link | comments |
the dark before the dawn

Worth It

“Worth Dying For”

Written by Glynnis Whitwer, Senior Editor – “P31 Woman Magazine,”

Proverbs 31 Speaker Team Member

Key Verse:

Philippians 1:21, “For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain.” (NIV)

“I love Jesus Christ and that is why I am on fire with the desire to

give Him souls, first of all my own, and then an incalculable number of

others.” --Alphonsus Liguori

DEVOTION WRITTEN BY GLYNNIS WHITWER, SENIOR EDITOR OF PROVERBS 31 MAGAZINE:

Last fall, my 14-year-old son Josh, emailed me an article he found on a website.  It was about a Christian in China who was persecuted to the point of death for his faith.   There wasn’t any personal note from my son, just the article.  I read it, was moved and didn’t think much else about it.

Several months later, a magazine arrived in the mail addressed to Josh.  It was from the organization Voice of the Martyrs.  I remembered the emailed article and connected the dots.  Obviously, this website interested my son.

When Josh came home from school, I showed him the magazine and asked, “Why are you interested in this?”  I thought perhaps he’d discussed it at youth group or Young Life.

Without a pause, and with sincerity shining from his young face, he answered, “I’ve always wanted to be a martyr.”

My heart started to thud and my insides twisted.  This was not what I expected to hear.  My mind raced frantically, trying to make sense of his answer.  Surely, I reasoned, he doesn’t know what a martyr is.  Hoping my assumption was true, I asked “Do you know what a martyr is?”

“Yes,” he replied, “someone who’s willing to die for his faith.  I want that kind of faith.”

After recovering from the shock of his answer, and battling the fear of a mother’s heart, God revealed something to me about my son’s desire to be a martyr.  It’s not that my son wants to die, but that he’s found something worth dying for.

At 14, Josh looks around him and sees people pursuing things that are meaningless.  He’s watched friends search for happiness in popularity, music, drinking, being rebellious and disrespectful.  Even his young mind can tell none of these things are worth dying for.

But many years ago, my son met Jesus.  And when he did, Josh discovered something that mattered … Someone worth dying for.

I believe God’s eyes roam the earth looking for a child of His whose faith burns in her chest … who loves Jesus Christ with such passion, that sacrifice for His sake is an honor.  The first believers were trained to suffer for Christ’s sake, while many today are trained to be happy and comfortable in their faith.

The call is loud and clear – Jesus is worth living and dying for.  Jesus is worth living life to the fullest.  Jesus is worth dying to self-centered desires.  Jesus is worth living as if every day could be our last.  Jesus is worth dying to a life that is all about us.

Jesus is worth it all.  Josh got this right.  Do we?

posted by: Jrobbins at 12:24 | link | comments (2) |
worth dying for

Ready to R-u-u-u-mble!

Holy Smackdown
The first wrestling match was even better than WWE.
by Jarrett Stevens

I used to be a big fan of Professional Wrestling back in the days of Andre the Giant, Hulk Hogan and Rowdy Roddy Piper, when it was way less sleazy and way more cheesy. Maybe it has something to do with the outrageous characters and ridiculous costumes. Maybe it's because of the moves. (The figure four leg lock is my personal favorite.) Or maybe it's just because they actually use the word "professional" in the title.

Even though people have been watching wrestlers throw body slams since the early 1940s, that's actually not when wrestling began. In fact, wrestling finds its roots in the Bible of all places, in Genesis 32. The story revolves around Jacob, who had definitely seen better days. Jacob's name literally meant deceiver— and that's exactly what he'd done earlier in his life when he stole his brother Esau's blessing (Genesis 27).

Jacob had spent the better part of his life running and hiding not only from people he'd deceived (another story for another time), but ultimately from God. But now he was at the end of the line. Word came that Jacob's brother Esau was coming to meet him with 400 men. This was it. Jacob assumed the worst. But as Jacob waited for what he thought was his demise, the strangest thing happened. Genesis 32:24 says that Jacob was, "… all alone in the camp, and a man came and wrestled with him until dawn" (NLT).

Many Bible scholars believe that the "man" was not a man at all (or a "professional" wrestler) but actually an appearance of a pre-incarnated Jesus before he was born in Bethlehem. So this was no ordinary wrestling match. Jacob was literally wrestling with God! And apparently Jacob was a tough opponent, because it says they wrestled all through the night, until dawn. (Apparently they hadn't invented tag teams yet.)

Jacob continued to wrestle until God gave him something—a blessing. Genesis 32:25 (NLT) says, "When the man saw that he couldn't win the match, he struck Jacob's hip and knocked it out of joint at the socket." With one touch of his finger (this was God's secret finishing move), the match ended.

The truth is, God had the upper hand all along, but he stayed with Jacob and struggled with him in order to deepen and mature Jacob's faith. When the match was over, the "man" asked Jacob what his name was. (Maybe Jacob was wearing a mask, but probably not.) Jacob gave him his name, and in verse 28 the man replied, "Your name will no longer be Jacob," the Man told him. "It is now Israel, because you have struggled with both God and men and have won" (NLT). It is this very name that the nation of Israel is still known by today, a people who have seen their fair share of struggle with God and man.

In the end we see Jacob isn't awarded an oversized gold Title Belt, but rather a new name, a new purpose, and a new identity. But it came with a catch—at the end of verse 31 it says Jacob walked away from the match with a limp. A limp induced by the fingertip of God. A limp he would struggle with for the rest of his life. A limp that would serve as a daily reminder of a God who allows us to wrestle with him, but is always ultimately in control.

Can you imagine wrestling with God? Seriously. Imagine putting God in a "reverse full nelson" and not letting go. It's kinda hard to imagine, isn't it? Images of sweating dudes in tights don't help, but I think it's something deeper than that. I wonder if it's because we have such a hard time actually struggling with God.

Maybe you think all God wants you to do is shut up and fall in line. Maybe you were told you should never question God. Maybe that's kept you at a distance from God. But real faith is never formed in the safety of the stands. Faith is formed on the mat. Faith is formed in the blood, sweat, and tears of struggling with God and not letting go. God didn't punish Jacob for wrestling with him, but honored him by giving him a new name and a new identity (Israel).

When was the last time you honestly struggled with God? When was the last time you asked God some really tough questions? When was the last time you prayed some really bold prayers? When was the last time you refused to let go? This is where real faith is formed. This is where we experience God, like Jacob, in a new way—a God who allows us to wrestle with him, but is always ultimately in control.

posted by: Jrobbins at 18:11 | link | comments |
holy smackdown

Faithful until Death

From the Open Doors website:

“Cause me to hear Your loving-kindness in the morning, for in You do I trust; cause me to know the way in which I should walk, for I lift up my soul to You.” (Psalm 143: 8)

Carl Moeller, Open Doors USA President/CEO, reminds us: “Our goal is not to end persecution, but to strengthen God’s church in the midst so that His Kingdom will continue to grow.” Our prayers should not be against persecution itself, but for the strength of the believers, and that the fullness of the Gospel and the Kingdom of God will be realized through their testimonies. The reality is that persecution is difficult to face. And that is why God is so glorified through the faith of His persecuted children.

The following letters are from Chinese believers. The first reveals the discouragement often faced, and the second illustrates the triumphant power of Christ to stand firm regardless.

China: Voices in the Dark: Letters from China’s Suffering Church

(A letter from a believer in Shandong Province) “I often give out Christian tracts, but on one occasion recently, the police took me to the police station and shouted and swore at me…They arrested me at 8 am…They told me it was forbidden to distribute tracts, to attend house churches, and that I must go to the ‘Three Self’ church…They interrogated me, made a record and prepared a case against me. I am really quite weak. When I recall the fierce faces of the police, I am frightened. I don’t have a scrap of faith and don’t dare to give out tracts again. Previously, I used to pray that our Heavenly Father would keep me faithful unto death, but now faced with reality, I feel a coward.”

(A letter from a believer in Zhejiang Province) “Praise the Lord that, until now, I have had no trouble. When the fear came upon me, through prayer God granted me great peace. Up until now, the Public Security has not found me. But the original fellowship I attended at university is facing persecution. Their meetings now have to be very secret. To think that my name may be recorded on a government black-list is enough to make one lose hope. But more importantly, my name is written in the Lamb’s Book of Life. I don’t know what the future will hold. Perhaps I will lose my present job, or even languish in jail. But I believe deeply that God is in control of everything. Whatever I have to face is all according to His perfect will.”

Please pray:

-For the faith, perseverance, and courage of these persecuted Christians as they continue to endure incessant hardships, obstacles, and discouragement for their faith.

-For these believers in particular, and for the entire Persecuted Church in China—that they will always find comfort and rest at the foot of Jesus in the midst of trials.

-That the testimonies of the persecuted Chinese Christians will continue to be an overpowering source of Christ’s love and truth to a dark world, and that God will use their lives for His glory and the expansion of His Kingdom.

posted by: Jrobbins at 13:26 | link | comments |
chinese christians

Why Hymns Rock

  “I am much in­ter­est­ed in sac­red songs,” writes a mis­sion­ary in Eng­land, “be­cause it was the first verse of ‘On­ly Trust Him’ that opened the door of my heart to let the Mas­ter in­to my soul in all his ful­ness. I was in the ar­my, and found my way to the Wool­wich Sol­diers’ Home, where I heard the Gos­pel; and for a fort­night I was grop­ing in the dark for peace, when one ev­en­ing I heard the sing­ing of ‘On­ly Trust Him,’ which brought light in­to my soul. I have ev­er since been hap­py, serv­ing Him with my whole heart. I am now a mis­sion­ary to my com­rades."

Sankey, pp. 212-4

Only Trust Him

By Ira Sankey

Come, every soul by sin oppressed;
There’s mercy with the Lord,
And He will surely give you rest
By trusting in His Word.

Only trust Him, only trust Him,
Only trust Him now;
He will save you, He will save you,
He will save you now.

For Jesus shed His precious blood
Rich blessings to bestow;
Plunge now into the crimson flood
That washes white as snow.

Yes, Jesus is the truth, the way,
That leads you into rest;
Believe in Him without delay
And you are fully blessed.

Come, then, and join this holy band,
And on to glory go
To dwell in that celestial land
Where joys immortal flow.

O Jesus, blessèd Jesus, dear,
I’m coming now to Thee;
Since Thou hast made the way so clear
And full salvation free.

posted by: Jrobbins at 12:34 | link | comments |
only trust him

Wrecked?

"OUT OF THE WRECK I RISE"

By Os Guiness

“Who shall separate us from the love of Christ?

Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine

or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written:
   "For your sake we face death all day long;
      we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered."

God does not keep a man immune from trouble; He says - "I will be

with him in trouble." It does not matter what actual troubles in the

most extreme form get hold of a man's life, not one of them can

separate him from his relationship to God. We are "more than

conquerors in all these things." Paul is not talking of imaginary

things, but of things that are desperately actual; and he says we are

super-victors in the midst of them, not by our ingenuity, or by our

courage, or by anything other than the fact that not one of them

affects our relationship to God in Jesus Christ. Rightly or wrongly,

we are where we are, exactly in the condition we are in. I am sorry

for the Christian who has not something in his circumstances he

wishes was not there.

"Shall tribulation...?" Tribulation is never a noble thing; but let

tribulation be what it may - exhausting, galling, fatiguing, it is

not able to separate us from the love of God. Never let cares or

tribulations separate you from the fact that God loves you.

"Shall anguish...?" - can God's love hold when everything says that

His love is a lie, and that there is no such thing as justice?

"Shall famine...?" - can we not only believe in the love of God but

be more than conquerors, even while we are being starved?

Either Jesus Christ is a deceiver and Paul is deluded, or some

extraordinary thing happens to a man who holds on to the love of God

when the odds are all against God's character. Logic is silenced in

the face of every one of these things. Only one thing can account for

it - the love of God in Christ Jesus. 

"Out of the wreck I rise" every time.

posted by: Jrobbins at 12:44 | link | comments |
out of the wreck i rise

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